The Penis Chronicles presents, “Fall suddenly or heavily asleep.” The google definition of zonk as a verb is “1. Hit or strike 2. Fall or cause to fall suddenly and heavily asleep or lose consciousness” (February 7, 2017). My older boy has an amazing ability to zonk out; it has never been a trait I… Continue reading Fall suddenly or heavily asleep
I hear bickering. I hear: 7 year old: “Oh yeah, you’re a vagina king!” 4 year old: “Smell my butt!” Now, had these boys been about 10 years older I am sure I would have died from shock. However, my alarmed brain realized that they were selecting random word combinations for maximum impact. So, “vagina… Continue reading Your Guess is as Good as Mine
“That’s great that you put your shirt on, but your ass will be cold on the way to school if you don’t put on your underwear and pants” (Letter T 2017 A-Z). He comes flying into the room wearing only his pajama shirt and carrying the days clothing. A devilish smirk is plastered on his… Continue reading Mental Eye Roll
Several days before my younger son told his own dragon story, which he told as mostly description, I had told the boys a story about a pink dragon: Dragon Yawn. I know he enjoyed Dragon Yawn because his good morning story was about a dragon. He climbed onto my side of the bed and wiggled… Continue reading Um, Pardon?
The Penis Chronicles presents, “By Way of Explanation.“ The four year old yells, “mom call the man, call the man!” My husband looks askance. The four year old leaves off his “call the man” chant to press his face against the window and yell, “There’s Steve, there’s Steve.” The seven year old leaps from the… Continue reading By Way of Explanation
My bedroom is shrouded in twilight. The sounds of tiny feet shuffling on the carpet breaches the silence. I pretend to get a few more minutes of sleep. The bed rustles and tiny bodies slide against my sides still warm from their own sleeps. I sigh inwardly wondering when their internal alarms will stop sounding… Continue reading Twilight Walkers
“Mommy I can’t sleep tonight. I’m going to have a bad dream.” The little voice cried from beneath the depths of blankets and stuffed animals. This was quickly becoming a regular occurrence that needed to be curbed. Hmm, I thought to myself as I looked down at the tiny form that was now reaching up… Continue reading Dream a Little Dream
Who needs _________________________ when you have kids and/or dogs? Who needs an alarm clock when you can wake up to the sound of the dog throwing up?! Who needs an air freshener when you have the natural scent of “oh-de-toilet” thanks to your children who like to leave their poop fermenting in the toilet? “Who… Continue reading A Who Needs Post
I originally posted “Santa Photo Mom” in December 2015. I am re-blogging it today because we will be getting Santa Photo’s soon and I can’t help but remember the experience that lead to this post. Dear Santa, It is that time of the year again, and I wanted to be the first to send in… Continue reading Santa Photo Mom
Edible blood covered cupcakes to celebrate Halloween. Edible Blood: Agave Coco Powder Red Food Colouring Add 1 drop of red food colour to the top of the cake mix and swirl with a toothpick before placing in the oven. The boys loved making the designs. Ice cupcakes with a frosting of your choice, I like… Continue reading Halloween Baking with Boys
Brewing Coffee, Twisting Words & Breaking Pencils 