Statement of Guilt

I didn’t mean to kill him!

I felt disembodied as I watched the flow of water controlled by my hand. All the crevices in my flesh seemed magnified as my slender fingers allowed the water to rise higher. The sound of the water was muffled by the dirt around his body.

It wasn’t a quick death. I thought watery deaths boasted speed and little suffering? Yet, I watched Cal for days without realizing I was losing him. Then the limpness was there; he drooped and his colour changed.

My panic was a delayed reaction. Maybe I could have saved him at that point but I didn’t know how. So I froze and I waited.

While I waited he drowned!

I mourned Cal’s death. He had a special place in my heart and he always will. Cal the cactus was my first house plant!

By Shari Marshall – 2019